The Beaver Game
My pregnant and obviously perverse sister-in-law Elizabeth taught me this kick-ASS new game called The Beaver Game. The only rule: replace one word of any movie title with the word "Beaver". Sounds kind of...dumb, right? Scoff if you will, but play it anyway. Elizabeth and I nearly asphyxiated from laughter playing this game. She nearly pee-pee'd in her panties. Give her a break - as I said, she's pregnant. Even Ramon was howling. I have been all alone, elbow-deep in dishwater, and have made myself laugh so hard that I've had to collapse on the floor, heaving feebly and kicking fitfully at the dish towel.
Here are some of the titles she and Ramon and I came up with:
"Citizen Beaver"
"The Thin Red Beaver"
"Saving Private Beaver"
"The Beaver Whisperer"
"Lord of the Beavers"
"On Golden Beaver"
"Places in the Beaver"
"A Clockwork Beaver"
"The Beaver Zone"
"The Beaver Redemption"
...and on and on. Know which one got us laughing hardest? The one-word movie titles, like "Chocolat". We'd be furiously thinking of movie titles and then someone would glance around and say "Beaver" very suggestively. And we'd all piddle ourselves a bit.
Cerise
Here are some of the titles she and Ramon and I came up with:
"Citizen Beaver"
"The Thin Red Beaver"
"Saving Private Beaver"
"The Beaver Whisperer"
"Lord of the Beavers"
"On Golden Beaver"
"Places in the Beaver"
"A Clockwork Beaver"
"The Beaver Zone"
"The Beaver Redemption"
...and on and on. Know which one got us laughing hardest? The one-word movie titles, like "Chocolat". We'd be furiously thinking of movie titles and then someone would glance around and say "Beaver" very suggestively. And we'd all piddle ourselves a bit.
Cerise
posted by Cerise at 10:25 AM
7 Comments:
Oh, god. I'm wiping my eyes on my desk blotter...
"My Friend Beaver"
"The Beavers of Navarone"
"Beaver! Beaver! Beaver!" - this one's a bit of a cheat, but "Tora" is the same word over and over, so...
"Bridge Over the River Beaver"
"Uncommon Beaver"
"The Sweetest Beaver"
"Steel Beavers"
"Beaver and Joon"
Going to die now. I was flailing around laughing and nearly rammed my pencil into my eye.
"Brokeback Beaver"
[heaving weakly] You're right. I give.
I rarely if even laugh out loud when reading. At most I'll eek out a smile. But this game manages to inspire a baritoned berry cotton candy chuckle. Thanks a lot.
-Ramon
[laughing] "Your coming is as the footsteps of doom. You bring great evil here, Beaver-Bearer!"
"Baritoned berry cotton candy chuckle"? Ramon, are you hitting the sauce? If so, where in this house are you hiding it?
Just had to look through my kid's titles:
"101 Beavers"
"The Beaver of Jafar"
"The Beaver King"
"Beaver on 34th Street"
"The Beaver Down Under"
"The Great Beaver Detective"
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